Happy New Year - Bring On 2010!

Not only is it the eve of a new year, the close of a decade & start of a new, there will be also be a full moon (the second for the month), a lunar eclipse .... a blue moon to boot. Maybe it could be seen as a good omen. New Beginnings marked by rather an auspicious event. Something that only happens every 20 years or so.

We've nothing grand planned for tonight. Just a nice quiet evening at home, with my bottle Bailey's at the ready, my husband, my children & Shaun Micellaf with his zany, crazy humour watching his New Year Rave Party on the box.

2009 has been a difficult year but I made it through. Life's challenged me in many ways & somehow I have managed to keep my head above water & keep myself from drowning in the mess. Whilst pondering over the events of the last 12 months I realise that I need to take better care of myself. I need to spend more time with myself, for myself!

I realise that I let my responsibilities as a mother & wife override what I need for myself. And what I need for myself is to allow myself the time to persue my own personal dreams. I love my family very much & it isn't their fault that this has happened. The blame for this situation lies solely with me. I let it happen!

So with this in mind I begin a New year with a clearer mind, a clean palate & a new drive to see things change. Bring on 2010!

Remembering my teens!

Some days are diamonds! The weather was glum, rainy & humid but this wasn't enough to put a damper on the day.

How lovely it was to spend this time with these very special woman. Both so kind, warm, worldly & definitely not short on the smarts.

All of us different in many ways, living differing lives but still sharing one commonality & that being our teen years.

Even though I know so much time has passed since those years ... just being with them brings those feelings flooding back. How very special were those years!!! Impressionable years, so exciting, so confusingly wonderful & never to be forgotten.

Trophy Day!

What a truly special day it was for them all today. The anticipation of this day has been building for weeks. For some of these beautiful people, this will be the only celebration that they will experience this festive season.

Each of them are called by name to receive their team trophy. For each one, the expression of excitement is written all over their faces when they hear their name called out loud. This is followed by a chorus of cheers & applause. They radiate pride, which is what this is all about. The building of pride, of achievement, of self esteem!

It is wonderful to see them achieve & grow.

Exhausted Mind!

Today I have experienced it all!

Every emotion that is humanly possible to feel in one day!

Love

Pride for a loved one

Empathy

Sympathy

Concern

Sadness

Fear

Hurt

Confusion

Doubt

Anger

Happiness

How can so many things happen in one day that would cause a person to experience such an array of emotion.

Some things weigh heavy on my heart ! I've no idea how to alleviate what burdens my mind.

My heart & my head are at war with how to solve the problem.

This unfortunately is the condition of the human mind! We have these complex, thought filled minds that never stop working, they are designed to problem solve. This, I feel, is both a blessing & a curse.

When life throws unpleasant events in my direction, I immediately go into problem solving mode. I feel as though it is my job to make things right & when this process fails, it causes my mind to go into overdrive.

Oh my goodness the complex nitty gritty of life .... is so, so exhausting.