Time

I sit here now, in my flannys, my witchy woman hair all over the place & feeling tired but still not tired enough for bed. I am remembering times of long ago. Moments of time prompted by the faces I see before me on the screen. Some moments lack clarity but others play back like re-play on a dvd.
I never thought I would ever feel this way, but time, the passage of time, scares me. Maybe this is because of the work I've done. The things I've seen, the stories I've heard & the experiences I am having today with a few of my clients.
When I was 20 I used to think 40 was old. I know it is warped thinking to think this way but with each tick of the clock, life is being carried away. There is an urgency to make my life matter & to make it better. To live & to experience more.
For many years we became stagnant in our existance. Settling for ' whatever' & whatever is in no way enough. It is not the wanting of material things that I speak of....it's more moments spent with family & friends, experiencing more sun rises & sunsets in different destinations, visiting & experiencing places I've not seen before. I want to smell, see, taste & feel new things. No more waste...I must use what I have whilst I have it!